Cross Roads






SIX SONNETS

     I.  SOMEHOW

     Somehow I never thought that you would go,
        Not even when red war swept through the land—
     I somehow thought, because I loved you so,
        That you would stay.  I did not understand
     That something stronger than my love could come,
        To draw you, half-reluctant, from my heart;
     I never thought the call of fife and drum
        Would rend our cloak of happiness apart!

     And yet, you went... And I—I did not weep—
        I smiled, instead, and brushed the tears aside.
     And yet, when night-time comes, I cannot sleep
        But silent lie, while longing fights with pride—
     YOU ARE MY MAN, THE FOE YOU FIGHT MY FOE,
        AND YET—I NEVER THOUGHT THAT YOU WOULD GO!
     II.  I WONDER

     I wonder if you dream, across the night,
        When watchfires cut the vivid dark in twain,
     Of long dim rooms, and yellow candlelight,
        And gardens drenched in vaguely perfumed rain?
     I wonder if you think, when shot and shell
        And molten fire are singing songs of hate,
     Of that last throbbing moment of farewell
        When, in your arms, I promised you to wait!

     I wonder, should grim death reach out his hand,
        And speak, above the strife, of peace and rest;
     If you, alone in that dark stranger land,
        Would feel again my head upon your breast?
     And if, as light and love and living slips,
     Your prayer would be my kiss upon your lips....
     III.  SOME DAY

     Some day when on exultant feet you come
        Back through the streets that echo at your tread—
     My soul will thrill to hear the throbbing drum,
        And yet, perhaps, I'll sit with drooping head,
     Not caring, quite, to meet your steady gaze,
        Not daring, quite, to look into your eyes;
     Afraid because a weary stretch of days,
        Each one a million years, between us lies.

     My heart—my heart is ever yours to hold,
        And yet, while I have waited here for you,
     You have seen faith betrayed, and brave youth sold,
        You have seen meadows drenched in bloody dew—
     It may have changed you, and your eyes may be
     A little harder when they look at me!
     IV.  DREAM

     Sometimes I dream that you are back with me,
        And that with hands together clasped we go
     Like little children, young and glad and free,
        A-down a magic road we used to know.
     Sometimes I dream your eyes upon my face,
        And feel your fingers softly touch my hair....
     And when I wake from dreaming all the place,
        Seems lonelier because you are not there.

     What is a dream?  Not very much, they say,
        An idle vision made in castled Spain—
     Well, maybe they are right....  And yet, today,
        When all the warring world was swept with pain,
     The suffering and sorrow ceased to be,
     Because I dreamed that you were back with me!
     V.  UNDERSTANDING

     Now, when I stand in some great crowded place,
        I see the souls of other women stare
        Out of their eyes—And I can glimpse the care
     And worry that has banished light and grace
     From every life.  Upon each woman-face
        I see the mark of tears, the hint of prayer
        That, one short year ago, had not been there—
     I see what time will never quite erase!

     Before you left, I did not notice eyes—
        Because I knew that I might touch your hand,
        I did not dream the dread that swept our land...
     Ah, dear, the months have made me very wise!
        Now, one with everything, I understand,
     And heart meets heart and I can sympathize.
     VI.  THE WAKING

     Now war is over and a world set free,
        And youth returns, triumphant, to our land—
     And dear-heart, you'll be coming back to me,
        With eager lips, and tender outstretched hand!
     You will be coming as you came of old,
        At evening time, with laughter lilting gay;
     Glad of the little things that life may hold—
        And I will meet you in the self same way....

     Yes, in the shadows by my oaken door,
        I will be waiting as I used to wait—
     And I will feel that you are come, before
        I hear the clicking of the garden gate.
     And, in the darkness there, my pulse will leap,
     Reviving dreams that long have lain asleep!
     AFTER PEACE

     "I wonder what they're doin' home tonight?"
     Jim said—
     We sat there, in the yellow firelight,
     There, in a house in France—
     Some of us, maybe thinkin' of romance—
     Some of us missin' buddies who was dead—
     And some just dreamin'
     Sorter hardly seemin'
     Ter make th' dream come clear.

     An' then—Jim spoke—
     "I wonder what they're doin' home ternight?"
     Says Jim—
     An' some of us felt, well—as if we'd like
     Ter smother him!
     An' some of us tried hard-like not ter choke,
     Th' smoke
     Was pretty thick an' black!
     A-thinkin' back,
     Across th' ocean I could sort of see
     A little house that means just all ter me
     And, though nobody said a word I knew
     Their thoughts was goin' on th' self-same track—
     Thoughts do
     Out here, in France.

     Home—HOME—No wonder that we all was still—
     For one of us was thinkin' of a hill,
     With pine trees on it black against th' moon—
     And one of us was dreaming of a town,
     All drab an' brown—
     An' one of us was lookin'—far an' high
     Ter some one who had gone back home too soon
     To that real home that is beyond the sky.

     Nobody of us spoke fer quite a while—
     We didn't smile—
     We just sat still an' wondered when there'd be
     An order for ter send us home—
     Back 'crost the sea.
     Th' war was won—
     An' we was DONE!
     We wanted faces that we loved an' knew,
     An' voices too—

     We sat an' watched th' dancin' fire fling
     Its shadders on th' floor—
     Bright shapes, an' dim.
     An' then Jim coughed as if his throat was sore,
     An'—"Say—let's sing!"
     Says Jim.

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